Eavesdropping
by Boomerang-chan
Summary: Misao and Megumi visit Kaoru. Kenshin, Sanosuke, and Yahiko overhear their conversation and they are not exactly thinking the cleanest! NO LONGER ONE-SHOT! CH. 3: Aphrodisiac
1. Eavesdropping

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is not mine.

**A/N**: To say the least, this is a weird little thing I wrote in class one day when my teacher was talking about...something. ^^; 

As for the rating...you'll see why when you read it!

**Eavesdropping**

By Boomerang-chan

    It was a gorgeous day at the Kamiya dojo. The sky was a pastel light blue, wisps of cottony clouds scattered about, caring to stay away from the sun's smoldering golden visage.

    The tall form of Sanosuke Sagara ambled in, fists jammed into the pockets of his white pants. He'd been out all last night, and ended up losing his remaining money to the dice. _Again. Frustrated, he had been drinking and out of consideration, despite his muddled state, had been able to drag himself over to his shack for the remainder of the evening.  _

    Customary to any habitual day, Kenshin was doing the laundry quiet and happy by himself. Yahiko, not too far off was practicing his kata.

      A typical day at the Kamiya dojo...

      Or so he thought. 

    Upon entering, he noticed Aoshi who was sitting, probably meditating, silent as cool as ever. 

    '_Chuh_, if he's here, it could only mean the little itachi girl dragged him along_.' A chibi version of Makimachi Misao popped into his head, screaming, '_I'm not a weasel you baka rooster!_' _

    As if to confirm his suspicions, from the room that Aoshi was sitting outside from, he heard her voice blurt out unexpectedly. 

    "NO WAY! Lord Aoshi's are better than either of theirs!" The man of her affection did not seem to be affected by the outburst, or he simply ignored it. Sano would have sweatdropped. 

      Yahiko padded in right then, shinai balanced on one of his shoulders. 

      "Weasel girl, Megumi, and Aoshi came to visit," he stated simply.

*``````*

    "OHOHOHOHOHO! What are you talking about? Sanosuke's was much larger than his!" Megumi's voice chimed.

      "Like _you would know, Megumi!" Kaoru retorted._

*``````*

    Outside, Sano resisted the urge to gasp and Yahiko bit his lip, appearing to be stifling a fit of laughter. Sending a warning glare to the spiky-haired boy, Sano pressed his ear closer to the shoji door, holding his breath.

*``````*

     "Lord Aoshi's is still the best!" Misao piped eagerly.

    There was a very audible snort here and the sound of strangling, probably Misao to the one that has made the offensive sound. 

      "Aoshi's still aren't as long as Kenshin's!" Kaoru argued. 

    "But Sano's," Megumi reasoned, "is so much larger than Ken-san's! It probably couldn't fit in a room, let alone a house!" 

*``````*

    Sano's eyes bulged, until they almost seemed that they would pop right out of his face. His head was beginning to steam, and he was sure it would burn through the thin screen door. 

    Meanwhile, Kenshin had looked up from his laundry, noting the change of atmosphere in the area. Things were much to quiet...and considering Sano and Yahiko were there...this silence wasn't good.

    Leaving his laundry to sit cold and untouched, the red head rurouni walked into the house. His violet eyes blinked upon seeing Yahiko and Sano pressed close to the shoji door where the girls' voices emitted from. Aoshi was still by himself, eyes closed and still deeply immersed in his mind.

*``````*

      "...You're exaggerating Megumi!"

      "He's tall, so he can probably handle something that humongous."

      "Yeah, but I bet Himura couldn't!"

      "He so could, Misao!"

    "Ohohoho! He may be strong and all, but he's too short! He'd probably topple over from the weight!" 

*``````*

      "Oro."   

    Kenshin almost fell over, but not from *_that*, from the surprising things the girls were discussing. Yahiko and Sano whirled around, sending him a warning look to keep quiet._

    Rubbing the back of his head sheepishly, Kenshin stood to join them in their eavesdropping.

*``````*

    "Hah! Aoshi-sama has two!" Misao cried out smugly.

    "Hmph, but he used to only have one," Kaoru quipped back.

    "But neither of theirs is as gigantic as Sanosuke's." Megumi said in an I-am-so-right,-let's-end-this-already-voice.

    "True...." Kaoru began softly, "But Kenshin is much more experienced than either of them..."

*``````*

    "OROOO!"

    WONK

    WHAP

    Kenshin tumbled over when Sano's fist and Yahiko's wooden sword pummeled on the opposite sides of his head. Muttering an undistinguishable 'oro', Kenshin lay sprawled on the floor, eyes swirling.

    "Hey, what was that?" Misao queried suspiciously. Megumi's elegant hands slid open the shoji door.

    The fox doctor's head popped out from the room, kendo teacher beneath hers, and genki ninja beneath hers. 

    "What's wrong with you guys?" Kaoru asked, noting the blushing sheepish looks on their faces, well, Sano's and Yahiko's since Kenshin was still on the ground, though slowly regaining consciousness. 

    "W—were you guys talking about..." Sano trailed off.

    An evil glint sparked in Megumi's eyes. She burst out laughing. "Ohohohoho! I see!"

    "Huh?" Misao and Kaoru chimed at the same time, not knowing what the freeloader was thinking. 

    "We were comparing Kenshin's, Aoshi-sama's, and Sano's different types of swords," Misao chirped obliviously. 

    "Y—you were?!" stammered Yahiko.

    Kaoru snorted. "Yeah, what else did you think we would be talking abou—HEY! YOU STUPID PERVERTS!!!!"

    A furious Kaoru dashed after Yahiko and Sano, brandishing her bokken fiercely.

    Misao blinked, then turned to Megumi. "What's going on Megumi?"

    Megumi sighed at her naiveté, "They thought they were talking about _it_," she merely replied.

    Misao's mouth formed into an 'o', then realization struck her like a thunderbolt. "EEEEEW! THOSE MORONS!" 

    And Misao joined Kaoru, bokkens and kunais poised to do some serious damage. Megumi, too refined for running around merely watched in amusement. A confused Kenshin got up sooner or later, deciding not to get in between the squabble going on to return to his beloved laundry, still thinking Kaoru was not as innocent as he thought. 

    Meanwhile, Aoshi remained sitting alone deep in mediation. 

*``` Owari ```*

End Notes: LOL! This was a ton of fun to write! XD If you don't get this, well, then, uh, you've got a really, super squeaky clean mind!!! This is just a silly little story I came up with (compared to the dark poetry I write. O_O) so it's nothing to take serious... I'm posting another one-shot, a more serious, probably next week.     

Finished: Fri. 12/04/03

Finalized Draft: 12/05/03

Please leave a review! ^o^


	2. Seduction

Disclaimer: Haven't I already done this before? 

A/N: Yeah, I know. This was originally meant to be a one-shot. But then just yesterday I was spacing out (happens a lot) and then the idea just went poof! 

**Eavesdropping**

_By Boomerang-chan_

**Chapter 2****: Seduction**

      "So have you slept with Himura yet?"

      "WHAT?!" Kaoru screamed at the ever exuberant ninja girl.

      Misao Makimachi bounced jovially up and down, her infinite energy pointedly obvious as always.

      "Yeah, yeah, yeah!!!" Kaoru had blushed down to her roots and looked about ready to hit the weasel girl in the head.

      Kaoru sputtered furiously. "Wh-what do you mean have I slept with him yet?!?!"

      Green-blue eyes flashing mischievously, Misao giggled and nudged her suggestively with her elbow.

      "Oh, come on Kaoru! You know _exactly_ what I mean! Have you seduced Himura yet?"

      Hands fisting, Kaoru blushed even harder. 

      "Seduce him?"

      The two girls failed to hear the faint scrape of a pair of geta behind them.

      "What am I supposed to do?" Kaoru asked jokingly as she threw her head back, closing her eyes like some love struck little girl. Clutching her hands to her chest, Kaoru proceeded to chime out in a high pitched girly, singsong voice.

      "Oooh Kenshin, you're just sooo wonderful." She tossed her head, midnight ponytailed locks fluttering. "Kenshin, you sexy beast, make love to me over and over again tonight. Make me your woman--"

      "ORO!"

      Kaoru stiffened instantly, ice of embarrassment running down her spine. Misao looked to be holding back from falling over with mirth. Gawking, she turned around to see Kenshin standing there with lavender eyes wide and appearing to pop out of his sockets any second.

      If Kaoru ever blushed so hard, it was now. She felt even more embarrassed than when Kenshin had barged in the day she first met him and she was taking a bath. But... she had seen him...without clothes before too. At the hot springs...

      Kaoru's conscience chuckled at her. '_Thinking naughty, Kaoru?'_

      '_He was the one who crashed out of the bushes!'_ Kaoru argued back_, 'It was his fault.'_

     _ 'Don't kid yourself,'_ the voice retorted, '_you know you would like to see **that** again.'_

      AAAAGH! Kaoru felt as if she was red from head to toe, and even her hair felt like it was hot.

       Back to reality-

"GAAACK!"

      Misao, who was now laughing insanely, choking as she tried to stop her chortling, but her coughing went unnoticed as Kenshin and Kaoru stared flabbergasted at each other.

      "Oroooo," Kenshin muttered and quickly turned around. So his assumptions were correct. Kaoru-dono was not as innocent as she let on.

      Kaoru watched Kenshin retreat away; probably to go do the laundry while he contemplated over what he just heard.

      '_Mou!__ What must Kenshin think of me now?!'_ the female kendo instructor's mind screamed to her.

      Slowly rotating around, Kaoru stalked over to Misao. A vein popped out on her forehead.

       _Eep__..._ "Eh, Kaoru-_chan_?" Misao squeaked as Kaoru's shadow loomed over her. 

      "How could you do this to me?!"

      And Kaoru throttled Misao until her eyes were swirling wildly.

_______________

Well... This chapter was kinda short. The next one is probably going to be short too, but not like this one...

_This fic is dedicated to all my friends_: **Isabella**, **Hannah** even though you know nothing about animé, your mind is tainted by *_ahem_*, **Marlene**, **Waterflash**, **and all our other *_ahem_* club members**.

**Next Chapter**: **Aphrodisiac**: **_Misao and Aoshi side story_**

**Next chapter should be out by Friday!**

**_Please R&R!_**


	3. Aphrodisiac

**Eavesdropping**

_By Boomerang-chan_

**Chapter 3**: **Aphrodisiac** **_A_****_ Misao and Aoshi Side Story_**

"You want me to give Lord Aoshi opium?!" shrieked Misao.

Megumi sent her a warning glance. "Not so loud silly." It was already evening of the hectic day and Kaoru had insisted that Misao, Megumi, and Aoshi stay over. All were asleep except for Misao and Megumi who were talking by candlelight in the same room.

"It's not opium itachi musume," Megumi tossed back a raven lock, ignoring Misao's growl at the hated nickname.

Misao looked down at the packet in her hand, fingering a bit of the white substance. It was powdered very fine.

"Then what is it?"

"It's an aphrodisiac." Megumi stated as if she were commenting on the weather.

Misao's eyes widened considerably. "AN APHRODISIAC?!"

"Ssshhh!"

"Oops. Sorry."

Anyways, as I was going to say before you interrupted me, this is a powerful aphrodisiac. Pour into your 'dear Aoshi-sama's' tea and he'll be all over you in a snap."

A blush spread across Misao's ecstatic face at the prospect of having the icy blue eyed man of her dreams lying on top of her and—

"Are you listening to me?"

"Hm...? Oh, yeah. Sure Megumi..."

Megumi sighed and left the room. Misao failed to notice the fox ears popping from her head. 

__________

The next morning, two figures watched Misao wake early. She skipped to the kitchen, greeting Kenshin who had started the daily chores.

"Are you crazy kitsune? You gave that little weasel an aphrodisiac?"

"There's nothing to worry about, tori-atama. I'm just teasing her."

Bumbling with excitement, Misao prepared a kettle of hot water, making a mess in the process that would make even Kenshin frown. She sang to herself a happy, high paced song, sounding much like a chattering bird. (I'm thinking of _1/2_ or _Sobakasu_, except not as bad. XD) Misao popped the kettle onto the stove.

She had learned how to make Aoshi's tea perfectly because of her unhealthy obsession with the ninja okashira. The water was boiled; hot, but not too hot you'd get your entire mouth scalded. Rummaging through the cabinets, Misao picked out a plain white cup and carefully measured some tea leaves and the water, twitching with excitement. Something too heavily decorated would not exactly suit Aoshi, would it?

Emerald eyes flashing wildly with mischievous glee, Misao withdrew the packet from within the front folds of her short ninja attire.

Dumping all of the powder in she watched it dissolve quickly with satisfaction, already dreaming up a fantasy.

__________________

Aoshi, sitting cross-legged by himself, breathed deeply and evenly. At the sound of rapid pattering footsteps, he opened his eyes to have glacier blue shift up to a beaming Misao.

But not the usual Misao. She was wearing a kimono, probably borrowed from Kaoru because it was too long. The sleeves kept slipping and bunching at the hands that held a small wood tray.

"Your tea, Aoshi-sama!!!!"

Misao rushed over to the ever stoic Aoshi, kneeling in front of him with the warm drink. She hummed jovially to herself, pushing up the ruby sleeves.

Aoshi glanced down at the tray and picked up the cup. He sniffed at it inconspicuously when he brought it to his lips. Looking up, Misao grinned at him widely. Expressive jade eyes twinkled up at him in adoration. And something else...

She was up to something.

Mentally shrugging it off, Aoshi took a slow sip.

"Misao."

"Hm?" Misao stared intently at him while he put the cup back down.

"...  
  


"Wh-what is it? Is something wrong with the, uh, tea?" she stammered meekly.

"......... It is too sweet."

Brows puckering together in a frown, Misao took the offending tea and took a large gulp despite the blank stare pointed towards her.

"..."

Misao sputtered incomprehensible words in rage.

"Th-This is.... THIS IS NO APHRODISIAC!!! IT'S SUGAR! MEGUMI, YOU CONNIVING FOX, I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!!!"

Snatching up the ends of the kimono, Misao rushed out to find Megumi and pound her skull in.

Aoshi looked back down at the tea. Pushing it away for precaution, he went back to his ritual meditation.   

A/N: This was not as fun to write as the other chapters... But it was the first time I wrote something A/M-ish. Well, more like a one sided Misao thing I should say. ^.^ 

**HELP! I've had some requests to do one where Kenshin is overheard... Any ideas to give me? If not, it'll take a while to come up with something, or I'll just skip right to what I had planned. But I wanna do something with Kenshin... SUGGESTIONS WOULD BE APPRECIATED! Thank you!**

Response to Reviews:

**Waterflash**: I WANNA READ IT!!!!! *blush*

**SilverKnight7**: My mind is very tainted... You should hear the things me and my friends say. Well, maybe you shouldn't XD

**Kitsune-Onna19**: THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! I've made my point now too. XD

**Aharah** **Musici**: Do you know what the *ahem* club is about?! I'm not sure if you could join. My twisted friend who reads too much yaoi-ish stuff is the leader...

**TanukiGirl22**: Yeah, kinda noticed by your name. I like it by the way. ^.^

**Neko**-**KyoLover**: Thanks. I like your name too. Why do I have this thing for names?!?!

**MZ**. **AMbER** **EYES**: Your name is awesome!!!! I'll _try_ to do one with Kenshin...

**Liz**: XD Thanks!

**Sweet** **Chaos**: Heh. Actually I kinda meant it to be that way. Your name is ironically cool! XD

**Battousai** **Girl**: Seriously?

**Icebluedragon**: Well, here it is!

See you next Friday! Hopefully, anyway. 


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